In this video, I’m going to be sharing my top strategies for feeling more confident on zoom, or in any kind of meeting where you just want to feel better about yourself and your abilities.
You can download the FREE confidence affirmations here
I don’t know if you’re anything like me, but in the past, I would get extremely nervous. In meetings, when there was that moment where you’re going around the room, everyone is taking it in turns to introduce themselves and say a bit about themselves. And I would just sit there, my heart felt like it was going to explode out of my chest, I would be nervously wringing my hands under the table and just worried that when the time came for me to actually speak, I wasn’t sure you know what was going to come out if anything at all. So I have 100% been there and these days, thankfully, I’m way more confident. I jump on Zoom and talk to hundreds of people at a time. I’ve got a podcast that’s listened to by thousands of people every single week, and I’m way more trusting of myself and my abilities and confidence in so many situations.
So if we don’t know each other, I’m Chloe Brotheridge. I’m a hypnotherapist and a coach. I’ve written two best-selling books, and I’m the host of The Calmer You podcast. So the first strategy I’m going to suggest for you is to change your attitude and start to reframe the feelings of nervousness that you might be feeling about speaking up or sharing an idea as excitement because nerves and excitement are very similar emotions. It’s the butterflies in the stomach. It’s that extra adrenaline, that extra energy.
There was quite a famous study at Harvard Business School where they got two groups of people and they told them basically you have to go on stage and sing, ‘Don’t Stop Believin” by Journey, (massive tune!) and understandably these students were kind of nervous about having to get up on stage and sing in front of their peers. In one group they told them to tell themselves I’m excited. And the other group, they asked them to try to calm themselves down. And guess what? The group that were telling themselves ‘I’m excited’, felt better, felt more confident, felt better about their performances and the people that tried to calm themselves down. So instead of trying to calm yourself down in a meeting, tell yourself I’m excited. In what ways is it exciting to share your ideas, to connect with people to have your voice be heard, telling yourself that can really start to shift this in your mind into something much more positive or constructive rather than something frightening.
How are you speaking to yourself?
So number two is all about the way that you speak to yourself. Now we all have a voice in our heads. And very often that voice is not very kind, or very constructive. We’re beating ourselves up, we’re going to the worst case scenario. So, if you’ve been doing that your whole life, it probably hasn’t been working for you. And so maybe it’s time to try something different. And so I’m really going to suggest that to you to start to change your self talk, start telling yourself more positive things.
My favourite affirmation
One of my favourite affirmations is ‘I am confident person’. ‘I am a confident person’ – saying that to yourself over and over again, have a little note on the mirror that says this so that you can remind yourself of this. And there have been so many reports about affirmations and how it can really help us to change our inner dialogue and our self talk. And I actually have a free mp3 download that you can grab. It’s an affirmations mp3 to really change your self talk, you can grab that at the link below. Thirdly, imagine what could go right. Now if you’re anything like I have been in the past, your mind can go to the worst case scenario you’ll be imagining this meeting imagining going bright red or losing your train of thought or not being able to express yourself in the way that you want.
Imagine what could go right
Instead of that, what we really want to be doing is imagining what could go right, imagining how we want to be different, how we want to feel in that meeting. So imagining yourself, standing tall or sitting tall, looking directly into the camera, speaking slowly and clearly breathing deeply, and feeling this confident energy. And if you get into the habit of imagining this positive version of yourself, you’re going to send that message to your subconscious mind and it’s going to make it so much easier for you to feel confident in those scenarios.
Feel those feelings
And then lastly, I just want to remind you that it’s okay to feel a bit nervous. It’s okay to feel that sense of your heart racing. It’s not a sign that you should keep your ideas to yourself or not speak up. It’s actually a sign that your heart is telling you this is important to you. It’s so normal to feel nervous. Even the most confident speakers will tell you that they can feel nervous before every single speech. These feelings of nervousness show that you’re human, they show that you care. And that’s a beautiful thing.
Don’t fight it
So instead of fighting against a racing heart or feelings of nervousness, can you instead, just welcome those feelings and allow them to be there and know that actually, you can still speak up, say what you want to say and get your ideas out there. Even though your heart might be racing. If you fight it ends up strengthening those nervous feelings. If we can embrace it and welcome it, the natural response is that we end up calming down. So which of these strategies are you going to be giving a try? Let me know in the comments below. And if you want to grab that free confidence, affirmations mp3, click here.
Thank you so much for reading. Sending you lots of love.